I went to the mall today and saw a mall cop zip by on a segway. It was an odd, somewhat surreal moment.
I was never a big mall teenager in high school. I was never a big anything teenager in high school. I was a bit of a loner, but I had my own little group of friends. I was a bit of a stick-in-the-mud, but not as much as some other kids. I mainly hung in the background and spent most of my time outside of school at home.
So, I don’t really know what the mall scene was like. Did people go on dates to the mall? Did people form cliques and gossip at the mall? Did shopping together form some sort of intimate high school bond that I missed out on?
I feel like there were many subcultures within high school that I was either not aware of or intentionally kept on the outside. In a way, I’m somewhat glad. I get the feeling that a lot of high school drama just caused unnecessary angst. I didn’t have to deal too much with what people thought of me because I kind of flew under the radar most of the time.
In another way, I do kind of wish I had more of a high school experience just because I’ll never have that chance again. In general, I feel that way about a lot of things. I wish I had the chance to experience different childhoods, different high school personas, different college times. What if I had been into football instead of chess? What if I had been really into newspaper? What if I had majored in creative writing or theatre instead? What if I had never left China?
I wouldn’t give up any of my current life and experiences, but it is certainly interesting to think about. And it is something I wish I had: several lifetimes of experiences. Am I the only one that feels like this? Do others think about this too, or do they just go about their lives, content with one life to live?